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Spreading the Flame - Southern Africa Bible College

A Funny Thing

MY Last Supper The Longest Night Where Time Stands Tis The Season WHY NOT n-th degree Thanks Abide His Coming Road Closed! Fire, Fire the Body Hurts! How Much Space The Long Goodbye Driving Your Lazy The Blame Game Murphy Makes three on the Cards Nostalgia Empty Saddles Damsel in Distress Jack-in-the-Box Hearts Courageous Who's the Boss Wonder of Wonders Our Flag Heralds of Hope Don't back up Not Young Anymore Knew You Would Through the Middle In The River Auf Wiedersehen A Funny Thing Pennies The Sin-Bin Human Wrongs

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Benoni Bulletin 220407 "A Funny Thing Happened. . . ."

A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO CHURCH

Most preachers, including this one, have made some major "goof-ups" when preaching. The horror is that one is blissfully unaware of what was said or done. Have you ever heard a preacher say that Moses built the Ark? Have you ever heard a minister mention that Goliath killed David with a slingshot? I once had the sinful lady in Luke 7 washing Jesus' hair with her feet! I still cringe about that one. It is also rumored that I gave away the bride's father instead of the bride at a solemn wedding ceremony. Since I don't remember saying that, it probably didn't happen. However, there are some folks who maintain that it did and can produce witnesses. I try to avoid them while I blush in private! At least, we can conclude from this what we already knew--preachers aren't perfect!

Some preachers get razzed for being too long-winded in the pulpit. I don't know why. Some folks just have never heard of "Paul's Preaching Policy"-- he prolonged his speech until midnight and "talked on and on," Acts 20:8-9. One member, Eutychus, even fell dead asleep! One sweet lady in Benoni, Freda Davies, even felt the compulsion to make me the brunt of a self-composed poem:

The strangest tale I have to tell
Is about our local preacher.
One day his talk went on and on
Just like an old school teacher.
When will he stop? I cried in vain,
But on he went with fever.
And I went home and said a prayer
About our timeless preacher.
Next Sunday came, I sat in dread
And waited for the sermon.
But do you know another spoke
Which I thought was a good omen.
But sad to say and I must tell
That Al was quiet and lifeless
For since that day that I did pray
He now has laryngitis!

My response to this feisty lady was..."Smarty pants!"

Of course, some of us would rather preach than do anything. Bessie Hardin Chenault, a dear friend and long-time missionary wife in South Africa, wrote of a dream she had about me and my preaching. She said in the dream I was worn out with the pace of the preacher's work. When it was time to preach, I was too tired to stand up. So behind the pulpit where some velcro strips were glued to the wall, some enterprising brethren carried me over there. They then stuck me up against it so I could hang and deliver! Talk about dedication! That might be taking Paul's preaching "in season and out of season" a little too far, 2 Timothy 4:2, don't you think?

Every preacher has had his embarrassing moments that he would gladly forget. James says if anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his own body in check, 3:2. Just shows you that preacher's can be comical without even trying!!

Love you all,
Al - The Horne of Africa.

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