"I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase"
1 Corinthians 3:6
A Message From the Horne of Africa
"WORDS TO LIVE BY"
9/09/09
Tevia, in Fiddler on the Roof, had just given his daughter away in marriage. He ponders the gravity of the situation. Ah, but the children have grown up so quickly—just a few sunrises and sunsets and now they are leaving home! He sings "What words of wisdom can I give them?" The book of Proverbs is replete with advice for virtually every occasion. But let me share wise Words to Live By.
Encourage—According to the old cowboy song, on the range "there never was heard a discouraging word!" Since we are all capable of drawing both discouraging or encouraging banter out of the inner recesses of our minds, which is it to be? It's just a matter of choice which words you use to spice your every day conversation. "Encourage one another with these words" is how Paul expresses it, 1 Thessalonians 4:18. Later, he says, "build each other up," 4:11. Everybody loves an encourager. Be one! It will bless your life as well as the recipient!
Appreciate—“You never miss the water till the well runs dry" is a time-tested adage. So many people smooth the way for us, don’t they? Paul says, “For none of us lives to himself alone and none of us dies to himself alone,” Romans 14:7. People who do the most for us often feel their service is not appreciated. So, for heaven’s sake, let’s tell them! Let’s use "please" and "thank you" and express verbally how much they mean to us. They can't read our minds. One day will be the last day to tell them. The only trouble is we don't know when that day will be. So, don't suffer remorse after the last day has come and gone because you never let them know. Words of appreciation are like dew on the dry earth! We all need it. Be liberal with appreciation.
Forgive—No relationship can be sustained without needing to extend and receive “forgiveness.” By virtue of our humanity, we offend or hurt people quite often, especially the ones we love. Another old song says, “You always hurt the one you love—the one you shouldn’t hurt at all.” Remember that old one? [Hey, you’re showing your age!] Paul warned, “If you keep on biting and devouring one another, watch out or you will be destroyed by one another,” Galatians 5:15. The most practical definition of forgiveness is releasing my right to be hurt. No human being can actually extend forgiveness. Only God has the power to do that. But when we forgive, we "let it go." We don't dwell on it. Once the matter has been dealt with, we act as though the offense had never happened. We have peace in the soul when that happens. Let's remember the NINE WORD RECONCILIATION FORMULA: "I was wrong. I am sorry. Please forgive me! (See Ephesians 4:31-32).
Listen—“Active listening” means that we listen not just with our ears but with our hearts. We listen for the “emotional” message beyond the spoken words. It’s not just, "What did you say?" but "What did you really mean to convey?" That's why "feed back" is so important—“Did I hear you say. . . .?" We have to delve into the meaning behind the meaning. We can pay a person no greater compliment than to let him finish what he is saying, examining each one of his words with the mind and with the heart. Without interruption! When one interrupts, he says to the other one, "What you are saying is NOT important. It isn't worth hearing. I don't want to hear it. Let ME tell you!!" The speaker feels discounted. Jesus said, “Consider carefully how you listen," Luke 8:18. Respect begins with listening. It says, “You matter to me. I am here for you!”
So, let’s encourage, appreciate, forgive and listen. We will surely lift burdens. We will brighten our world. We will be a blessing. Try it, you'll like it.
Love you all,
Al—“the Horne of Africa .”
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